Do you need to make room for love?

by Mary Gorham Malia

Do you have any room for love? Are you a gay girl who is busy all the time? Do you have any time for love? Is there space in your life and home for love?

Chihuahua 300x280 Do you need to make room for love? Move over baby!

Are you busy working, exercising, taking care of your house, going to school, playing, raising children, traveling, creating, running a business, taking care of aging parents, hanging out with friends? And what else? There is so much we can do these days that keeps us busy and keeps our lives full.  So full that in fact we don’t have space or time for love in our lives.

Attraction Tip #5 says make a space for love in your life.

Don’t just make space but make a welcoming space for love. Make a space and invite love into your life and your home.

This is Step 5 in a 5 part series on attracting love. Here is a recap of what we’ve been learning:

1. Envision the relationship you want to be in

2. Release toxic ties and let go of your past

3. Set and intention for your love life

4. Give yourself the love you’re saving up for someone else

5. Make a welcoming space for the love of your life

If you’ve done the work laid out in Steps 1 through 4, then Step 5 is going to be easy because you’re ready. So let’s look at how to make a welcoming space for love in your world.

First look at your home. Is this environment ready to welcome love? Is there space for the love of your live to come in and hang her coat up, put her bag down and sit and cuddle with you? Is there space in the bedroom for her? Is there space in your closet or a closet? How about space in the bathroom? Do you have enough bath towels? Are you getting the message here?

Now for some of you this is so easy. Your home is open and inviting and ready. Hurrah for you. Is this isn’t you then you’ve got work to do.

Where is your bed placed? Is it up against a wall? Can she get in on the other side or not? Is there a bed table for her, a lamp and pillows? Is your bed even big enough for the two of you?

Is your bedroom a dark hole because you don’t care about it and tell yourself you’ll do something when “she” shows up? Do you even think about it?

Am I making sense here?

Start by making a list of five things you can do with intention to make space for Ms. Right in your living space. Look carefully at your bedroom and your bath. It isn’t about having 3000 square feet of space. You can live in the tiniest of apartments and still have a space that welcomes love. You can live in the biggest of houses and not have any space to welcome love. It’s part mindset and part actual living space.

Then look at what’s happening if you are someone who has a really busy life and schedule. Is there time in your schedule for a lover? If there isn’t any time for a lover, than don’t be surprised that no one is showing up. Can you look at your schedule and decide where you are willing to make time for a lover?

Now I’d like to suggest that for some of you, you actually need to change your schedule and open up some hours through your week so that you embody making time and space.

  1. For others, perhaps you can’t just stop doing some of the things that are on your calendar so start with this exercise:
  2. Set an intention that you are committed to making time for your lover
  3. Look at where you’d be willing to let go of activities in order to make room for your lover, such as not working so late into the evening if you own your business but giving that time to your lover.
  4. Block these times in your calendar or add a “meeting block” on your calendar so that you see these spaces everyday.
  5. Look at where you can share activities with your lover – breakfast, dinner, exercise time, etc. and make notes about this in your calendar too.
  6. When you look at your calendar everyday (on your computer or in your mobile phone or hanging on the wall) remind yourself of your intention that those blocks of time belong to your lover.
  7. Every chance you can, hold one of those blocks of time open. Get used to keeping your schedule open enough that you have time to spend with a lover and partner.

You should have a very clear idea right now whether your living space and your busyness are hindering or helping your ability to attract love. You have complete and total control over this. Really you do. So do something about it. Take baby steps if you must, but make some changes today. Take action today.

In this series on attraction, we’ve been focusing on what you can do to increase the magnetic pull to bring love into your life. It’s been about looking at the energy patterns you are living with and deciding to create a shift in those patterns.  This is, let me say it again, something you have total control over. You don’t have to wait for a girlfriend to show up to make these changes.

So take charge of your love life now. Set up the patterns, habits and thought processes that create a welcoming environment and prepare your own welcoming heart to receive love.  The only one who can stop you is you.

So here’s your homework – do this now! Don’t wait. Make room for love in your life today. It’s waiting for you. 


PS: Join me on Facebook. I’d love to see your face and know your questions about finding love and having a great lesbian life!


mgmaliaonline1 150x121 Do you need to make room for love?

Mary Gorham Malia

Dating coach extraordinaire for the gay girl community around the world! Helping lesbians find lasting love, have more fun and live the life of their dreams.  I’m an adventurer, passion seeker, mompreneur, friend and all around gay girl. I love connecting lesbians to their dreams and helping them develop the skills they need to live an extraordinary life and have an amazing relationship. I’ve done this through starting meet-up groups, planning travel events and adventures for lesbians  and hosting workshops and seminars to help women learn the secrets to finding a great match and lasting love.



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