By: Terri

Terri — Mon, 14 Apr 2014 17:50:24 +0000

How about a different study…in a more moderate sided city. Really, how many of us live in a major metro area? It would be more convincing to see the study done from a population of a city with a population base of <100,000 not all of us live in DC, LA, or NYC.

By: jennifer

jennifer — Mon, 14 Apr 2014 17:14:53 +0000

Excellent advice, Mary. fully agree— online dating is an amazing way to screen/meet people i’d never meet otherwise. but a bit of work upfront to learn successful approaches is really worth the investment of time and energy.

By: Kristine

Kristine — Mon, 14 Apr 2014 16:18:38 +0000

hello mary…having just perused the examples of hacking/dating cites,i am somewhat confused…i am a lesbian and am interested in knowing other lesbians…now,that might be a simple statement,BUT…it isn’t!…WHY should i follow ‘advice’ from a straight guy who is dating straight women,or ‘advice’ from a straight woman who dates straight men???…unless you believe that lesbians and gay womyn respond/re-act to the S/R system [Stimulus/Response] just the ‘same’ way that ‘hets’ do??…if so,then i suppose any advice fro one group would suffice for the others…BUT [again!],this is not so…gay womyn may want to ‘pass’ for straight and be appropriated into the system of ‘behaviourial-responses’ [the easiest way to classify groups’ movements by those who deem it necessary to control groups ( such as governments and homeland security),is to have us all respond likewise to pre-formed stimulii…yes,even in our dating patterns/habits,the basic assumption is that ‘being’ human means we follow the group so as not to be ‘excluded’…behavioural scientists have long devised templates-of -stimulii so that they may predict,control behaviour,because when the ‘authorities’ can predict and control,then any group which is visible in society is also controlable…[do you follow me so far??]…soooo,dating cites are just another manipulative tool of the patriarchy to get a reading on where we are in our lives and whether the big-business of government should be watching us closely or at a distance…the secondary concern is that since we are ‘human’,it is hoped that we respond in same fashion as ‘hets’ therefore more transparent in our visibility…soooo,Mary,dating cites have the potential of snaring people and habits as well as disappointing many lesbians…the WHOLE idea ,in my humble opinion,of being a lesbian is that we ARE different and liking it!!..therefore,we really do need NEW ways of relating that have no-thing to do with pre-programmed responses designed by hets!…i am not het and therefore my ‘be-ing’ is vastly different,therefore my responses must also be congruent with that wonderful difference!…any one,any where,can ‘say’ they are ‘anybody’ and that can and does prove to be the failure of dating cites…there is no ‘in-person’ contact and deceit is rampant…speed-dating is cold and impersonal,while offering the pretense of ‘practical’ and logical approach…NOT!!…soooo my summation is this…only daily exposure and observation of an ‘intended’ in the same locale,is the best approach…there is ‘time’ to ‘see’ the [ true and consistant] behaviour ,the ‘practice-what-you-preach’ formula of assessment,,the opportunity to view and see enacted,the ‘spirituality’ of the intended and the daily occasions of interacting that proximity presents……
well,that’s it for now…glad you are out there doing what you feel,but hoping you also ‘see’ that lesbians really do need a much better and safer approach than dating-cites…
Namaste,
Kristine…

Comments on: How To Hack OkCupid

By: Terri

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By: Kristine